Jabberwocky Variations
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Chemowocky

Mark Stewart

'Twas Boron, and the Silicon
Did Carbon in the Cadmium;
All Merc'ry were the Lanthanides
And the Molybdenum.

"Beware the Hydrogen, my son!
The teeth that bite! The chops that chum!
Beware the Bismuth bird, and shun
The dread Beryllium!"

He Gold his Cobalt blade in hand,
Long time the Fluorine foe he Zinc,
Till rested he by a Krypton tree
And Strontiumed to think.

And as in Argon thought he stood,
The Hydrogen, with Iodine,
Came Radon through the Tungsten wood
And Sulfured Astatine!

One two! one two! and through and through
The Cobalt blade went Scandium!
He left it dead, and with its Lead
He went Gallium back.

"And hast thou slain the Hydrogen?
Come to my arms, Antimony!
O Copper morn! Neon! Xenon!"
He Nickeled in his glee.

'Twas Boron, and the Silicon
Did Carbon in the Cadmium;
All Merc'ry were the Lanthanides
And the Molybdenum.

Mark Stewart (stewart@trenton.edu) writes:

I still think Kieffer's Jerseywocky is one of the best, for its sense of meter and its brilliant use of town names as verbs (a device I "borrowed" for my own contribution).

Having been inspired by the Jerseywocky spoof, I wrote Chemowocky in 1993, during a couple of lunchbreaks while a teacher of mathematics at Montgomery (NJ) Middle School. I couldn't bring myself to inflict it on my students.

(But apparently, he has no qualms about inflicting it on millions of people on the net, since he sent it to me to include on my site. --kl)

Mark's homepage: http://www.trenton.edu/~stewart/

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